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They Love Me In Monaco
After recovering from the madness of a concert filled weekend, things were back to normal. We had the pleasure of world premiering the new Magenta limited edition 2 CD set titled Home/New York Suite. Excellent discs. I kicked off the show with the classic disc from Marillion titled Afraid Of Sunlight that will forever remind me of when we first went on the air at WBZC. The rest of the show I was focusing on some classic material from the vinyl vaults. Release Music Orchestra, and the most responded to album of the night in Italian band Nova, and the 1976 release Vimana. There were more calls on that album than anything all night. I get the phone call of the night from a listener in Bensalem, PA. Mike says to me, "I cannot believe you are playing this. I really can't. I have been listening for 5 years before I go to the bar at 12:30, and never call in. I can't believe you are playing this album. This is one of the greatest albums of all time. No one knows Vimana. Thank you so much, you made my night. You never cease to amaze me."
That conversation made my night. That will stop you from questioning if you make an impact.
Memory #46
I was going through some old tapes recently and unearthed the January 1999 performance of North Carolina band Ozone Quartet. This was an excellent performance cut short by a broken bass drum pedal. It was dissapointing, but this is what happens. Great live radio, though. I remember distinctly that the studio was warm that day, but the band acclimated themselves. Hollis was rockin, and Wayne handled most of the interview. But they were able to churn out 4 or 5 songs. All in all it was a great show. Despite the bass pedal problem. Sadly, not too long after, the band would split. They would reunite just recently to release the Cloud Nineology CD. All in all..it was another great memory over the last 15 years.
The Lawrence Boulevard Massacre
After the show Saturday, I stopped as always, at Big Bob’s to meet up with rest of the gang to see how their night went and get input on what they thought of the final product on the radio. Pete had been a little drunk but decided to follow me out of Eastampton. As I headed down westbound Route 38 into Hainesport, the unthinkable happened. With the light being red, I downshifted to second gear as I approached the light at the distance of a 300 yards away. Just as I did that, the light turned green and I popped the Jeep into third gear. Just as I did that, here comes gallopin’ Gertie jumping over the median on eastbound route 38 to the westbound side, and hitting the front of my jeep. I had no time to stop, think, or move out of the way. It was done. I heard and felt it. I panicked. I pulled my Jeep over to the shoulder while Pete pulled up beside me. “Dude, it’s not your fault, you didn’t do anything wrong, just go. Let’s leave.”
I couldn’t do it. I told Pete to go and that I would stay with deer until he died. Shit it's the least I can do. As Pete drove away I began my approach towards the deer. She was clearly young. Maybe a year and a half at the most. She struggled and suffered. I couldn’t help it, I wept. I called the state police dispatch and they assured me that they would send someone shortly. Within 10 minutes, she died. All I could do was apologize repeatedly. I then got angry. “WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING??!?!?” I have been in Wharton State, Lebanon, Bass River REPEATED times and never hit a deer. Where do I hit and kill one? In Hainesport next to the Shop Rite. Huh? How does that happen? The police arrived and did the ‘pseudo cross examination’ on me. My adrenaline was up. So up....I didn’t fall asleep till 730. The end result? Being called murderer by my friends, and a deer just pulled off into the weeds. That’s it? That’s all you can do? What the hell do I pay taxes for?
Ultimate Uno Championship
Sunday I decided to surprise Roger and show up at the Piccalilli in Tabernacle, NJ. After watching another no name, one person band…I was hungry. Wings were on my mind. Now for years, when I worked at the Go-Go bar in Eastampton, I went on morning treks with Salty Serlenga to pick up wings from the Pic to serve that day (Sunday was free wings day). I vowed I would never eat one again. Yeah..............that went out the window. I had one large order with celery and blue cheese, while Rohario went with the fried scallops. After noticing 10 dollars missing, we called Bob to see what he wanted to eat. He asked for an extra salad bar. Not a salad, but an extra salad bar. I only have the jeep so hot wings will have to do. We arrived at Big Bob’s South and Val pulled out a deck of Uno cards. Ever play this game? Well first, it was my first time. Then secondly, who could possibly take this game seriously? We started at 1am. By 4am, I was ready to kill Roger. When it came to him to pick a color to make everyone change to, he would always reply with, “BLUE”. That was it. The rest of the night. “BLUE”. At one point even Bob got disgusted. We played round one which lasted 20 minutes and I won the first match. Round two lasted 3 hours with me having the least amount of cards the whole game, but losing officially at 4:45AM. I drove home laughing with my Uncle Ang’s USMC blanket around me. Until I passed Lawrence Boulevard.

This Program Ran 3 Hours And 52 Minutes

Above And Below
Sunday afternoon I received confirmation from Leonardo Pavkovic of Moonjune that I would be at the Iridium in NYC for the Allan Holdsworth show. I traveled to NYC with very little money but really wanted to go. I always tease Roger that he would travel to Australia if he had to to see Blues guitarist Billy Hector. That’s how I feel about Allan. Next to my father, he is clearly my favorite guitarist. His music has been the soundtrack to my life in more ways than one. It was a great day with the trip up the Turnpike. But not as warm as I hoped. The temp felt like 40 once you hit 60….and heavily wooded areas. But nonetheless, I arrived in NYC and you could feel the energy coming from the streets. It was nice to be back in the city that changed my world on 11/23/95. It was the day I decided to move forward with the radio show. I was at the cross roads. Stay with this girl that would hold me back from everything, or throw my energy into something that could benefit me later. I took the latter. As much as I bash NY’s people and dopey sports fans, I still find it to be THE city. It inspired me. Where else can you get shish kabob at 3:30 am from a street vendor? It also saddens me that after 9/11/01 and all the loss of that day, how many people forgot what happened to this great city. Americans forget too quickly. They’d rather complain that their personal freedoms are being taken away. (Like they really even know what they are) Meanwhile these are the same idiots that complain about smokers. Stop worrying about your phone being tapped and look at the fact that something that is not illegal is being banned from public places. (Brought on by Democrats no less) What’s next? Alcohol? That alone kills countless people a year with liver disease, drunken driving accidents, etc. “I don’t like second hand smoke….my clothes stink around smokers…” Meanwhile it’s ok for the casinos to have smoking in New Jersey. I am outraged. Like George Orwell said, All Animals Are Equal, Some Are More Equal Than Others. Don’t get me started. I walked into the Iridium, and as always, was treated with the royal red carpet. I get better treatment for shows in NY than I do in Philly. That’s fact.
Letters Of Marque
I sat down….had my Heineken…watched two lovers kiss…saw Lenny White in attendance…had a waitress think I was a student…drank my water…noticed members of the Mahavishnu Project there…admired Jimmy Johnson…watched Chad Wackerman’s distinct style…studied Allan. Starting to drift……counted charts…remembered the first time….the last time…the beach…route 559…the breeze…the head resting on my shoulder…the smell of salt…the turnpike…the partying on the way up…the love on the way back…the hug…the drive…the loss…the plans…the dreams...the card locked in the meter…the carriage…the street lights…holding on to her for dear life…and finally arriving back in my seat at this show with nothing but memories and damp eyes. Thank god the waitress distracted me with a question. I left the theater after chatting with the great Leonardo. I walked back to the car and waited for it…while they waited for 26.50$ Southbound to exit 4 with texts from no one and catchin up with Puddin. The check is in the mail.
Wishing for a ladder to climb out this car.

The World Is Just An Ashtray
It was a somber Friday morning. It rained on the way to the Griffith Morgan House in Pennsauken, NJ. That was wear my girl would be in her final moments of this phase. It poured even heavier on the way home, both internally and externally. But things happen for certain reasons. When I arrived back into Maple Shade, the clouds cleared dramatically and the sun made its way through. I got the message. I will be alright. The house has been different, but I can’t dwell on it anymore. She is gone. She lived a long time, and had a great home. I may have even squeezed 4 or 5 years more of life out of her than she was supposed to have. I was blessed. I felt more for Opus the last few days. He is very happy go lucky with not a bad bone in his body. Unfortunately, he is looking at me for answers to questions he doesn’t know how to ask. The best I can do is keep him preoccupied with fun things and plenty of food. My overall view is to show him that I still love him, and that life moves on. Now if I could get that down at times, I would be a gem.
Passing Through The Hindu Kush Mountain Range
Jack arrived at my house with the Weis beer and a special CD for our Ray Ray. We awaited Rohario’s arrival while Godfather played in the background on repeat. Roger was ancy. He arrived at the homestead with one thought in mind. Partying. But not here. He broke out in a brow sweat staring at us with his keys in his hand. Almost pacing. “You guys ready or what?” I explained that Echolyn wouldn’t be going on till at least midnight. This made him more frustrated. Jack and I decided it would be better to leave and divert any confrontation between us holding Rohario back from the Jungle Juice. We drove to Philly so fast that Echolyn wouldn’t be playing for another week. (I know that is funny) Once we arrived in Philly, Roger tried to find a lot to park in. We found one, but instead of doing what most people do when they arrive somewhere (like getting out of your car and actually going to the venue) we had to sit in his car while he drank his Chocolate milk, Jungle Juice, and lit a cigarette. We couldn’t take it. Jack and I wanted out of the car. I can’t stay in a confined area for too long. I just can’t. I went and hit a MAC machine, Jack hit the street, Roger was close to hitting the pavement. When I came out on to the street from the MAC, Jack was half a block just shaking his head staring at Roger across the street. Roger is an enigma wrapped in a conundrum. It was only 8:30, so we decided to head to the Plow and The Stars. Echolyn was in there at a large table enjoying spirits. As we walked in, the aura of uppity ness in the bar reeked. Big diamonds, Rolexes, married women away from their husbands for cocktails, cigars, arrogant bartenders, snide laughter, and the smell of cheap perfume was in heavy doses as I walked up to the bar. I somehow got caught with 2 older woman singing happy birthday. I used my smooth line like, “you must be happy to be 23…” That will get you far if you say it the right way. I walked back to the tables where the gang was and began to drink. In the midst of Grey Goose revelry, I gave Brett some pointers on eye contact with women. I hope it worked. It was later suggested I should teach a class and hand out pooka beads to my new students. Jack and I where hungry, while Roger kept going outside. We decided to order what Ray was having and delved into Shrimp Roll madness. Ehhh..did nothing for me except keep me from drinking. We then found ourselves under the spell of two women, Lindsay and Shannon. They were two dancing waitresses that made sure all of our drinks will filled to the brim. Along comes Joe Stout who began coaxing them to cross the street to the Khyber at midnight and help me introduce Echolyn. As Ray drank the juice, I was visited by one of our big fans in Stacy Shannon. She brought 2 friends with her to see Echolyn who looked clearly bored. She was the life of my table in the second half of the night as we featured Chad Hutchinson in featured cameo appearances along with Mike Ostrich who we insulted frequently.
Make Me Sway
We come up to the front door, and our problems began early. The idiot, you know the typical ‘I think I own the place’ bouncer states clearly to us that we aren’t on the list. He wouldn’t even let Ostrich in who is helping the band. Nonetheless, he went from being an arrogant cock to looking like a complete douche bag when Andrew goes, uhh…dude, Tom’s name is right on the paper you are holding....as are his ticket winners. I actually saw this toolbag blush. Dude, you’re a bouncer at the Khyber. Why don’t you make yourself useful and clean the puke up off the bathroom floor. You aren’t a partner of this bar or anything, so get over yourself. After walking into the mystical Khyber, we started with a round of Yeungers. I began clearing a path for Echolyn and Mike to quickly get their gear on stage and do their soundcheck. Within minutes they were ready. Paul was in shambles. He’d caught a stomach virus from his kids and apparently was having a difficult time trying to pretend he was normal. So, I kept bottled water in heavy doses on the stage. I ran up and got the band some brews and headed back to my spot. Roger was teetering. ROCK AND ROLL BABY. Their stage presence, despite the size and compression was incredible. This was their first performance at The Khyber. And this also marked the first time in 15 years I would be introducing the band. I have hosted shows with Finneus Gauge, Always Almost, had them in teh studio over the years...never got the chance to introduce Echolyn. This was big. Being a fan since the mid ninties....this was special. The venue was great in a dirty kinda way. I have seen some awesome space rock shows there in the past, but this was great. They then went into Georgia Pine from the new album The End Is Beautiful. Another great, tight song, but the thing that was annoying me was the photographer standing right in front of me and Jack. We tried to be patient but I could see Jack was starting to get annoyed. He couldn’t go to the show at the NJPROGHOUSE because of the fact he was in Florida that Sunday. Now I know why Ray vanishes when he is on stage. He crouches down. Ray is my height, maybe shorter. It all made sense now. During Georgia Pine, Rohario tried diligently to grab his Soda, but with the lights and strobes flashing, he couldn’t focus. I turned for a second to look at Jack and saw him cracking up watching Roger being fooled by how close the cup actually was. The band then broke into the live staple track from As The World titled The Cheese Stands Alone. This was another moment I was happy to see Tom Hyatt back. The song is faster, tighter, and Ray is way more animated. In the final chorus by the way I listened to hear if Brett would still do that KLING KLING KLING KLING on the guitar right before they go into the words Staaaand On My Own... He did :)

No More Wishin' You Away
Stacy Shannon, one of our loyal listeners in Jersey was in absolute heaven with Echolyn. This is a good feeling when you turn someone onto a band they never heard of, and a year later they are drooling to see them live. Great feeling. You have done your job. I started having fun when the jolt of 7/29/05 hit. The title cut, The End Is Beautiful. I was able to keep feelings in check during this version...and it did keep things in perspective. Part one of the test was followed by 25 minutes of Mei, part two of the test. As I listened, I was the only one in the room. I became oblivious...it was Summer 2002 again. As the song came to a close, it was May, 2006. The tape of life keeps rolling. As do I. And that's one reel I can't slow down or rewind. I think I am about 7 minutes from the end of the song at this point within me. I'm tired. I can't wish you away anymore. It's pointless.....you've been gone with all heavy blue miles crushed. After a huge ovation, Echolyn went into The Arc of Descent (Dancing in a Motel Just West of Lincoln). I could feel that Brett was really into this one. Heart and soul. It was just him on stage. The band then went into the classic title cut from As The World. Tight as always and right on. Great stuff. At the end of the song, the went into their chatter amidst themselves which I was told later by Jack that Ray's words included me and Roger and the Jungle Juice. Sweet! What an honor. Roger went to lift both arms up to cheer "YEAH" and took the guy out next to him. Oh....how I loved these days.
You Don't Have To Go Home, But You Cant Stay Here
We left the Khyber, thanked Andrew, looked for Roger, and Jack didn't even get to finish his beer. We headed back to the car with one thought in mind. Food. Jack insisted on giving directions and lost the bet in being quiet from Olde City to the bridge. As Roger learned what gears make us go forward, we headed towards the beloved Ben Franklin and made our way to the Golden Dawn Diner on Route 38. That was where I met Kristina our waitres. Whoa. Sweet. Jack ordered his Bacon and Eggs and was thoroughly dissapointed with the Bacon. Roger just ate in delight as always. I could have been a pile of poop. He would have shovled it in and smiled. Kristina was unfortunately taken, but told me if she was single she'd ask me to wait till she got done at 7 a.m. Well...at least it's a start.

I walked out....into....another..... (pauses)

Shenandoah
Back in early 1999, a friend of mine was getting married. She had asked if I would be interested in taking care of a few pets of hers. I later found out it was because her soon to be husband more or less gave an ultimatum. It’s either the cats or me. She had said to me in so many words that if she couldn’t find them a home, she was going to have them put to sleep. I had met the cats previously and wondered if I could in fact take care of them. I work a lot, and with the radio show consuming any other free time I had, including going out occasionally, would make it a challenge I wasn’t sure I was up to as of yet. So I decided since I was very alone living single, maybe it would be a good thing that I had some company….maybe it sounds selfish but, I needed personal communication within the confines of my then ‘new’ foundation of independence. That weekend, Chad Hutchinson stayed over my apartment to co-host our first of many to come Nearfest radio specials that Saturday night. While he hung out and watched the Flyers game, my friend arrived with the cats. I was a bit nervous not knowing if they would accept this change. I mean lets be truthful, they may be animals, but they are just like us. They get nervous in a new, foreign environment. And anyway, who is this new guy with door beads?
In The Meantime…In Between Time….
The two cats were quite a contrast. Silly Lyn, the female, was orange and white. She had stubby little legs and beautiful green eyes. She was a bit overweight, but extremely expressive and communicative. Opus, the male, was huge but not fat. He was very tall and muscular. He seemed anxious and confused after their former owner left them with me. He wouldn’t leave the foot of the stairs and certainly wouldn’t accept any attention or affection from me. Silly? She was giving kisses the first 3 minutes she was here. She made herself comfortable on the couch and instantly accepted her new home. As Chad stated to me, “She was a super sweet cat. She and I liked each other instantly.”
Within the first few weeks…I could tell two things. Silly was brilliant and personable. On the other hand, Opus was still hurt about being abandoned by his former owner. When I took her to the Vet, the one thing they kept saying was how alert she was to communication. When spoken too, she would talk back, yet look in your eyes while she did so. She would even follow your eyes. “She’s very intelligent..” the vet said. At first I was like, well, how does one know the intelligence of a cat? I realized in time the gem that I had in this cat. Time flew by. I learned what their likes and dislikes were. This is something only attentive pet owners will know. It’s a learning process. They truly are like people. For starters, as cool and social as Silly was, she was very finicky. Silly didn’t like anything that came in a can. She would just give you a look like, “What the hell is this? Give this to the idiot, I don’t eat this garbage.” But Silly rarely complained and usually stuck to her dry food. She was very playful, but I noticed a lot of the time in the first year and a half, she was lying around. Well, most cats do that, but she did it a lot. She still played and did cat things, but I could tell she would need to rest after a while. She was 13 when I got her, and age can play a role in being lethargic…but I never batted an eye about it. Silly loved to play with her leather mice, Opus preferred a fishing line with a piece of burlap at the end. And by late 1999, Opus had finally accepted me as his new ‘daddy’. But it was a strange occurrence that began our friendship. We had a nasty storm that whipped through the area, Hurricane Floyd to be exact. I learned quickly that Opus didn’t like thunder. He was scared and startled me with hiding behind my legs and looking up at me. I couldn’t help but smile. “Awwww…you like me now, huh….” From that moment on, Opus and I struck up a bond that only got stronger. Our new friendship was different than that of Silly’s. Silly loved me unconditionally already while Opus still needed at times to be reassured I wouldn’t desert him. That was when I opened the floodgates with the introduction of the outside front step. Opus was in heaven. Grass, bugs, Rabbits, Squirrels, and Birds. Everything a cat is built to pursue. Silly on the other hand, wanted nothing more than to just lay on the cement and let the sun’s rays envelope her. Her little green eyes would shine and her pupils would become pin slits and she would purr incessantly. I would turn to look at her and she would bark a flirtatious meow as if to say, “Thank you, I’m so happy.” I was convinced at the time that Silly knew just what looks to give get attention. She knew she was a cutie. I will never waiver my thoughts on that. She wasn’t that unaware…she knew how to use it to her advantage….yet never in excess without showing gratitude.
We Rise To Fall
Silly became a sleeping partner that only wanted me for her. And no matter what the weather may have been, she slept as close to my face as felinely possible. She would startle me some mornings with kisses that were rougher than the coarsest of sandpaper. At night, she would yelp at me when it was time to go to bed. Although demanding at times, how could you deny a face so beautifully expressive? Not to mention her repeating in perfect pitch of you saying ‘Hel-lo’. In early 2001, Silly started to slip a little. Not bad or anything, but I knew that her age was starting to show. Silly started missing the litter box. This usually means they are trying to tell you something isn’t right. Early on I thought that she was doing it on spite. She never liked anything I gave her treat wise so why would she take it out on me? When I took her to the Vet, he explained she had colitis. The smell was quite obvious it was bigger than just an upset stomach. In time, it cleared up, but it would soon become a chronic problem. Then a few months after she had gotten better, disaster struck yet again. Opus wanted to play. And granted, there were times Silly would be totally up for it. On one such occasion, Silly didn’t want to play. She wanted to sleep. I was doing spring cleaning and shampooing my carpets. Opus was relentless. He was determined to get her off the couch and play chase. He crept up behind her and bit her on the base of her tail. Silly flipped out. For the first time since I took over their care did I see Silly go spastic on him. Opus didn’t know how to handle it. I think he even realized he’d made a mistake. They fought and ran frantically and as she ran towards the stairs, she misjudged herself and I could hear her tumble down the steps. It ended with her crashing into the screen door. I knew it had to be bad. As I ran down the steps, the tail on Opus had been raccoon like, and Silly was on her side. This couldn’t be good. She growled as I came near her. She was hurt. I rushed her to the animal hospital to find out she had in fact sprained her left leg. It was bad. Not broken, but swollen enough to look like it. I tried not to laugh as she had to wear a mini wrap cast around her leg. My poor little girl. She rebounded from that but you could tell she was bit gimpy for a while. Also, you could never touch that leg following that…even when it healed. She became a wild animal when you did in fact touch it. Hissing...spitting...you know the deal. Just as long as you didn't touch her leg, you were in good with her.
Prior to me bringing her in for a check up, I found the paper work on the both of them while cleaning out some drawers in the kitchen. I found that Silly in fact had many problems. For starters, she was Anemic. After some blood work later I found out she had some slight Liver problems, and a Heart murmur. They also found she may have some arthritis. I also learned that Silly was in fact born in 1987. My girl was old already. Opus however, as a baby, was found on the side of a highway in Silly's home state of Alabama in 1993. My pets now officially ran my house.
A New Love
Jack decided to upgrade his video equipment and gave me his older camera. Instant fun. I videotaped the cats constantly. Almost OCD like. As soon as I came home, it was TV time with Opus and Silly. I know...lame. I would be thankful later. In early 2002 I decided that I wanted to settle down. Although my babies provided great company and hours of fun, it was time for something more. After a brief relationship failed, I met someone that I eventually would commit to. I never expected it, but it hit me like a freight train...love. But when you get me, you have to take the cats as well. I wondered how it would be. Hey a lot of people are allergic so you wonder sometimes. Shit...pets can make or break a relationship. When Silly met her, it was love at first site.
Silly usually had a good vibe on people immediately. She showed affection to our new addition and accepted her as one of her own. But make no mistake; there certainly was a pecking order. Although she loved being around her and found a new sleeping partner on a regular basis (My ex slept all the time), once I got into bed, Silly showed her allegiance. My ex would get mad, even jealous at times because Silly would get between us on the pillows smacking her tail against Meg’s head. I thought it was great. More or less, Silly was saying, "Look, I like you and all, but he’s mine…sorry, I was here first. And anyway, look how cute I am.” I always thought it was funny how upset my ex would get over the cat. As time wore on, they bonded even closer. They became close friends and I could see that Silly truly loved her. Silly always thought it was bed time when she came home from work. Very funny stuff. They’d both be curled up sleeping. Silly helped me as well. There were times when I would go through this ‘producer’s block’. Producer’s block is when I have no clue what I am going to do on the radio program when I have 3 or 4 major pieces already part of the puzzle. It has to fit and I will scrap the whole thing if it doesn’t work. If I had become stuck on an idea, I would get say, 5 different albums, either CD or vinyl, lay them out on the floor, and ask Silly to pick out one, or lay on the record I should play. Silly usually made good choices. She also had her dislikes. She didn’t like Ozric Tentacles or any other kind of Space rock….I know…..sounds nuts, but it’s true. When it came on, she ran.
L'Inizio Dell'Estremità
In October of 2004, things started change. Silly began to hide. Usually when a cat isn’t feeling well this is what they do. They pick a spot and go. She started hiding under the bed and I refused to let her. Something was clearly wrong. She started losing weight. Quickly. Within 2 days, she lost 5 pounds. She was defecating everywhere. She couldn’t control herself. At this point, there is no need to yell at a 17 year old cat and let her get more stressed. Not to mention, Silly was smart, she knew when she did something wrong, even if it was hours until I came home. The head would sink down, and she would look up at me showing the whites of her eyes. I decided there was no need to get frustrated. Once again, she’s 17. I took her to the Vet in Mount Laurel and found out she was in better shape than we thought. She still had the Heart murmur, her sugars were slightly high, her arthritis was affecting her injury from 3 years earlier, the anemia made her lethargic, and she did in fact now have IBS. So…some intravenous fluids, steroids, and stomach relaxers…and we were on our way back home.
Autumn
Silly rallied back and gained weight. She wasn’t as hefty anymore, but she surely showed she could rebound at 18. We gave her as much love as we could and she seemed to get better. She’d made a mess here and there but nothing to get crazy about. I still had to wash her behind since her arthritis kept her from doing so. She dreaded it, too. Growling, yelling at me, it was something that seemed like a surprise to her everyday. But, her butt was clean everyday. I’d always make it up to her with some leftover milk or dairy products. I also made sure the air conditioner was always on high for her. She couldn’t take the heat at all. But still at 18, she had all of her marbles. Then August of 2005 came. My then fiancée apparently had another side I had never seen and left us. Completely out of the blue, shocking and stunning everyone in her way, including Opus and most of all, Silly. While I tried to work through this, Silly was stunned. Silly started waiting at the top of the steps in anticipation that maybe…just maybe….she would return. This was the first time I ever noticed Silly down. Not physically, but spiritually. People say animals don’t know or feel anything at the magnitude that a human does. Complete fabrication. I will always argue this. Silly became withdrawn and would return to the top of the steps every night waiting for her sleeping partner to return. On top of dealing with what just happened in my life, I had to be sensitive to what was happening to my cat. Silly lost 9 pounds from August to January. A lot for an 18 year old. But Silly wasn’t selfish. When I had my moments about the situation, here is this cat, skin and bones, walking over to me, tapping me, licking and hugging my face as if to say, “I know Dad, but we’ll be ok..” One night in November, the ex showed up to try and exonerate herself from what she did. She walked over to Silly and Silly, without missing a beat, gave her an ugly look, snubbed her, and got up from her warm spot and trotted away as if to say, “Go away, bitch…don’t you dare put your scent on me.” The funny thing was, even the ex caught it. I never had to say anything. But I acknowledged it silently and chuckled to myself. My little girl truly is brilliant. One thing that always gets me, even now as I write, was the fact that as tough as it was to be alone again, I still had the cats. Life was still there. I had some issues the first few months the fiancée had been gone. A major league problem was getting up in the morning. I couldn’t sleep, but couldn’t awake when I finally did. It was almost like Silly knew. When the alarm would go off, I’d hear this very light grunt, and the petting of my face from her paw. Almost as if she was saying, ‘Come on, get up, you can do it. Turn that annoying thing off…..come on…wake up darlin…’ Another funny moment was when a truck backed up on the street and she started tapping me when I was sleeping thinking it was the alarm.Those memories will live forever in my mind.
Winter
By February, senility crept in. Silly started doing the light shake at times….just like an old person. The meows became barks. She hadn’t lost it yet, I mean hey, she still played the “I get the last word!” game on a daily basis. Sometimes I could swear she knew it was getting me nuts….and she won it quite often. She still waited outside the bathroom door when I would get out of the shower. She knew that if I went in this room, it must mean I am on my way to leaving for somewhere. She’d wait loyally at the top of stairs upon my return. Talking and readjusting her eyes to the suddenly turned on house lights, while questioning what was in my bags. A treat for her maybe? Her regular cat food became passé and she insisted on human food. Potato chips, steak, chicken, pork, pretzels, cheese, milk, rice, or anything else that was mine. I realized how much she needed me when I went away to Boston in February. When I came home, she yelled and barked for about 3 hours. I had a feeling she was upset with me. Almost as if to say, “Where the hell did you go? I hardly ate. You aren’t going to leave me like all the others, are you? Don’t you know I need you around here??” I made a vow not to go on any long trips unless I took her with me.
By March, Silly couldn’t make the bed anymore. She’d jump, and miss. I had to pick her up and place her on it so she could watch me work on my radio show. And her appetite for ANY food was getting ferocious. I started preparing her things like London Broil, roasted chicken…anything that would make her little eyes stay bright and happy. She’d still follow me from room to room, and make stops to rest during certain stretches. At night it was a little more difficult for her because she liked to sleep on the bed, preferably the pillow, but even if I placed her there, she'd get up in the middle of the night to be near her food dishes. On Thursday, I'd gotten home from work and decided to make a sandwhich. Along with the sandwhich, I had Frito Corn Chips. She slowly walked in the room and looked the oldest I had ever seen her. She asked for some chips and I laid an old show script down on the floor and let her crunch away. She loved them. I would breathe a sigh of relief seeing that at least her appetite never changed. She got a bit pushy with stuff I didn't want her to have (usually milk etc) but since she was happy, I pretty much let her get away with murder. After she finished snacking, she looked up at me as if to say, "put me up there." I obliged. So she sat on the bed while I typed away at emails. After an hour, I looked back to see that she had a very faraway look to her. I walked over to the bed and laid next to her and slowy carressed her head as she started to drum up a silent purr. She was weak. I could see it. My emotions caught the better of me. But as always, Silly would amaze me. In mid-tears, she turned her head and upper body and looked right in my eyes. She looked at me as if to say, "Hey, what are you crying about? I'm going to be fine. No need for that..." She licked my tears and gave me a hard face hug. My Southern Bell nuzzled her face into my shoulder and went to sleep. I awoke about 6 A.M. to her getting up and getting off the bed. I fell back to sleep. I left for work in a rush later and petted her head as she lie under the end table at the end of the stairs.

Silly passed away only minutes before I got home that night.

Opus sat in silence near the end table. It was the most somber our home had ever been. Our most level headed tenant was gone.

Silly is in a far better place. I pray and hope that she is playing somewhere, eating and doing what she wants. I was so blessed to have a sweet creature like her. She brought so much happiness and laughter to so many people. And this was a cat. Not a person. Humans should take lessons from such loyalty. I joke that she is the sweetest and most loyal woman I ever had, and I believe that is true. No more bone aches, no more upset stomach, no dried skin, all the hair ties she could possibly want to play with. I hope they have those corn chips she liked...cause god knows......I can't throw out this bag.

Until we meet again my little Shenandoah.....I will miss you terribly.

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Welcome Dana Ruset...
My buddy Ben and his wife Laura have finally had their little baby girl, Dana. Welcome to planet Earth! Ben, who runs the NJPINEBARRENS.COM website has been wildly stressed in anticipation of this. He can say officially now, that he has crossed into the final phase of full fledged adult world. Scary. All jokes aside, I think this is the best thing that could have happened for people in some situations. The only drawback is now Ben won’t have the availability to go exploring like he used to in the Pines. I am slightly bummed, but then again know that sometimes things take precedent. In a rare occasion, we dedicated tonight's program to little Dana. I look at it as a whole new world. And a new learning experience. I was kinda lucky years ago to date someone who had just had a newborn. I learned real quickly about feeding times, changing, feeding again, changing again, holding, feeding again, being puked on, and changing. Oh and feeding again. I don’t know if I want to go through that again. Hey at least I was doing it by choice then. (shudders) Speaking of kids, how cool is Dr. Bob Blinebury’s son? He is like 3 and is into King Crimson. Bless his heart. I will leave my empire to him when he becomes a Jedi. His mother hates that shirt.
No Consent No Parade.
Guitarist Scott McGill called me the previous weekend to let me know he would be holding a clinic at the Marlton Guitar Gallery off of Route 70. It was such a great day, I decided to open the back window as well, along with the doors, and head to the clinic on a sun filled Saturday. It’s funny sometimes. You don’t realize how much attention you can get with a jeep. If I was driving a 1987 Hyundai, no girl would bat an eye. But a Black Jeep Wrangler with mud on it with 75 degree temps and clear skies? Oh yeah baby. (Good thing they don’t hear it backfire) I arrived at the new shopping center and was surprised to see my digital assistant Jack Webster there. We met up and watched Scott talk about his Koch gear while he played different styles of music on the guitar. One thing I noticed after not seeing Scott play for a while, was that he has improved his chops and sound depth considerably. This guy never ceases to amaze me. He plays with such flair that it’s a wonder he isn’t a household name yet. Scott and I have nailed down June 3rd as our date for the world premiere of the new McGill/Manring/Stevens CD titled What We Do on the Free Electric Sound Label. This new disc features all classic and modern jazz and fusion standards. This will be released Aug. 22nd, 2006. What’s even cooler is that the liner notes were done by world acclaimed jazz/fusion journalist and author Bill Milkowski while the album was mixed by soundscape genius and guitarist David Torn. The disc is excellent with Nefertitti being my favorite track.
Bas No An Bua!
3/27/99 – Memory number 49, (there is no sequence really to the 50 weeks to 1000 memories I have been featuring) was a night when I look back, was a classic in the making. This night featured a live in studio performance of Scott McGill, Chris Eike, and Tom Poitress….better known as the Hand Farm. This was right before Scott’s new evolution into his future work with bass legend Michael Manring and drummer extraordinaire Vic Stevens. It was a warm but great night of fusion. Finneus Gauge was still together, Nearfest was new and hadn’t happened yet, and I had my 1991 snow white Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme Turbo with a 12 disc CD player, remote starter, and tinted windows. Sweet Moses. Where did the time go?

This Program Ran 3 Hours and 57 Minutes.